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I just helped a friend convince herself that magick is real. I couldn’t be prouder.
For the past few weeks, I’ve been practicing magick with a new friend, Lynae. We’ve done energy healing, erotic energy, and a few other things. You know, the normal stuff I write about here. I’ve taken the lead, but she’s shown me some neat things, too.
Then she sends me a journal entry, inspired by our time together. She starts with how alone she was as a teen, practicing magick:
Experiencing all of these amazing, transcendent things, all inside, all alone, with no language to talk about it, even to my friends, and not even a way to qualitatively prove to myself that it was real.
I know how she felt. Many of you probably do, too.
Then she writes about how she feels today:
But now I know magic is real. I’ve felt it come, with intent, from someone else, and we could communicate well enough that I could be sure it wasn’t just a story I was telling myself. And this feeling isn’t anything like that old euphoria [of those transcendent things] — it’s like wonder, or discovery, like waking up and finding myself in a story I had always hoped desperately was true.
Every other time I’ve gone looking for, or stumbled upon, or been shown something secret that I’d been wishing was true, I’ve been disappointed. It’s always been a pale shadow of what I thought it would be.
But not this time. It’s not even that it’s exactly what I hoped it would be…it’s that it’s exactly what I always knew it was, but could never confirm.
Through my teens and early 20s, this was all I wanted. To know magick was real. To shut down that repeating doubt that maybe I was sinking time into mistaken placebo and suggestion. Proof, not for the whole world, but just for myself.
I wish I’d had someone to show me that. And now, having done that for Lynae, I feel like I’ve done something worth doing, something worth being proud of.If you liked this post, consider visiting my current blog at mikesententia.com.