Posts Tagged ‘Resistance’

Resistance: When a Technique is Too Big (My Work June 21-27)

Friday, June 27th, 2014

You found my old blog. Thanks for visiting! For my new writing, visit mikesententia.com.

Every Friday, I discuss what I learned that week. Lost? Read the archives.

This week, I practiced extending my space, then encountered resistance and did nothing else.

We’ve talked about resistance before. The type where you don’t trust your path. The type where you stop daydreaming. Overcoming it with exercise and magick.

This resistance is different. I’ve encountered it before, but haven’t written about it.

Here’s what’s up: There are 5-10 steps to properly sending energy. Increase power (“heat”), create energy particles, extend space, and a bunch of moving energy here and there. No one step is hard, but each takes focus, each is tiring. Doing all of them together? Tiring enough that I find ways of not getting to it.

(There are two other factors here. First, I’m about to start another computer consulting gig, so I’m distracted. Second, the full technique requires someone else to send energy to, and if I kind of want to be distracted out of practicing, well, that’s easier with a friend around. But if I didn’t want to be distracted, I would have done the work already.)

I don’t have a set answer to this resistance. But I can see something of a path. If I were better at each individual step, I’d be less intimidated by the whole technique. And if the only hard, focus-requiring part was extending my space, I wouldn’t have resistance.

It turns out, extending my space is only required for energy effects in others. My body is already my own space, so energy effects on myself only require increasing power and creating energy. Which lets me split the problem in half, and lets me practice a useful technique. (Much easier than practicing because I ought to practice.)

So my goal for next week is to practice energy effects on myself until they’re easy and automatic. Once I’m there, I’ll use those now-easy steps as the building block of a new, larger technique to send that energy to others.

Hopefully next Friday’s post will be titled Embracing the Grind. Wish me luck!

If you liked this post, consider visiting my current blog at mikesententia.com.

Resistance: When Daydreams Become Too Realistic

Wednesday, May 7th, 2014

You found my old blog. Thanks for visiting! For my new writing, visit mikesententia.com.

Today, I’m encountering resistance. I just can’t bring myself to do the work. So I’m writing this. Maybe it will give me insight. At least it’s more productive than video games.

A little backstory: On Monday, I learned to use more precise energy signatures when building energy in my body. Yesterday, I practiced it. Today, I’d planned to follow up on that training, verify I’m doing it correctly, and ask a couple of questions. But I keep not doing it.

For me, resistance comes in a few flavors. Figuring out the reason helps me overcome the resistance, so let’s list them and see which feels right.

Sometimes, I’m overwhelmed by the problem. But my tasks today are pretty easy, so it’s not that.

Other times, my ethereal muscles are just exhausted. But I can do communication just fine for manifesting, and I can work with energy, so it’s not that.

It’s not laziness. This feels different.

Which leaves vision. Do I believe in this path?

Well, following up on this training is obviously what’s next in learning to create sensations that non-mages can feel. So I’m not resistant to this particular step. But maybe I’m resistant to the project as a whole.

It is a big goal. It defines a path. See, long-term, I want to build a research organization. Maybe a non-profit, maybe a company that sells healing sessions, maybe something else. But an organization and a team to build a science of magick.

One path is to learn manifesting for investments. Stocks, commodities, gambling, something like that. This funds the company, and everything is easy after that. (At least, it is in my daydreams.)

Another path is to develop a clear demonstration of magick, collaborate with established researchers to publish studies, then get funding for an institute, either investors or donors, depending on the structure.

Creating sensations is a big step down that second path.

(Why not do the first path? Because I roughly know how to do the second path now. Not sure how to do the first. A bird in the hand…)

And I just figured out this resistance: That path is becoming more real. My daydreams used to be, “Wouldn’t it be awesome to have a team researching with me?” But lately, they’ve shifted to, “How will I contact researchers? How will I roll publications into investments? Am I good enough at explaining magick to handle that kind of publicity? How much time would I get to study magick, and how much will be spent networking, fundraising, and running an organization?”

My daydreams stopped being daydreams. They became planning, and anxiety, and I started avoiding it.

How do I solve that? Two ideas so far:

  • I’m seeing this path as an option, rather than a requirement. Because I can develop this, then later decide what to do with it.
  • I’m also making the conscious decision to daydream about fun things, like sharing this energy technique with friends and lovers. That creates the happy feelings that make research fun.

Thoughts? Tips? Leave a comment.

If you liked this post, consider visiting my current blog at mikesententia.com.

Overcoming Resistance with Physical Exercise

Wednesday, August 21st, 2013

You found my old blog. Thanks for visiting! For my new writing, visit mikesententia.com.

This morning, I was looking forward to my magick training. I’d had another relationship end last Tuesday, and I hadn’t done much new magick in that week. I was excited to be back to normal.

But I just wasn’t quite there. Each time I opened my notes, I stared at them for a minute, then put them down. I couldn’t focus, couldn’t find the right mental posture. It just wasn’t working.

I tried introspection, thinking about what I wanted, seeing if I really believed in my plan. And I did: It’s a good plan, this is what I need to learn next, it’s a skill I care about knowing. Introspection didn’t help.

I gave in for the morning, watched a movie and played some games. That didn’t help either. Not that I was terribly surprised.

Then I remembered my post about physical exercise getting me out of a depression. I had made good on my resolution to exercise more, first doing curls with a coffee table to make sure I would actually exercise, then buying some adjustable dumbbells. I’d used them until the breakup, then had let them rest for that week.

I did a set. It was fast — I’d lost some strength from resting. But I worked until my arms couldn’t move the weight. Then I went back to my keyboard, rested for another 10 minutes. Then I did the magick training. And everything just worked.

Physical exercise fixed my resistance today. Have you had a similar experience?

If you liked this post, consider visiting my current blog at mikesententia.com.

Overcoming Resistance with Consciousness Integration

Friday, November 9th, 2012

You found my old blog. Thanks for visiting! For my new writing, visit mikesententia.com.

I’m trying to start a new project today. It’s not happening — too much resistance. But before we explore that, a bit of background.

You probably remember how learning level 2 communication helped my manifesting. What you may not realize is that, for close to a year, I’ve more-or-less known level 4 communication, used it a bunch of times, even gotten good manifesting results with it. But I never got L4* communication entirely correct, in part because it includes L2 communication as one of the steps, and, well, I didn’t know L2 communication.

*That’s how I refer to the level of a skill in my own notes. I’m going to use it here, too.

And seeing how useful L2 communication is made me wonder: What other skills have I missed? Did I skip L3 sensory connections? L1 shielding? What other holes are there?

And so, I’ve gone over about half of what I know, with the other half scheduled for November. I’d missed a technique for awakening mental muscles that’s mostly useless to me but will be excellent for beginners (and thus, excellent for my book.) I’d missed a skill with sensory connections that produces a holistic view processed from dozens of connections, which helps me see injuries and figure out the right approach to energy healing. And I’d missed a few other things.

But today, I’m stuck.

Last night, I talked with my mentor to pick the next skill to learn. He recommended physical and mental effects — energy healing, mood alteration, things like that — which would be useful, and he expects would give me good, satisfying progress quickly.

He also did manifesting for me, which said to learn level 3 communication, which leads to better manifesting, which will have the biggest short-term impact on my life. Not that L3 is particularly significant, but apparently something neat happens later on, at a higher level of communication. It’s a long path, but I trust the manifesting (especially my mentor’s manifesting), so I picked communication.

And yet, when I sat down to train this morning, I stopped, and instead wrote this.

My first thought was, “I’m good at L2 communication. And I might not be good at L3 communication. Certainly, I’m not good at it yet. And I just want to be good for a while.”

Writing this post, it also occurs to me that learning better manifesting is a long path. Not years, but months, maybe a year. So I can understand resisting that, and wanting to take a shorter path with a nearer payoff.

And yet, I still feel like I should learn communication. And I need to resolve all of this before I can get to work.

First hypothesis: What if I really want to learn physical effects, and that’s where this resistance is coming from? Let’s test it. I’m going to decide to study physical and mental effects, and see if the resistance disappears.

(Give me a minute to get into that new state of mind.)

Nope. The resistance lessened a bit, but it’s still there. Did not vanish.

So I think it really is that I just want to be good for a while. Proud of what I’ve learned, instead of uncovering more things I don’t know. Which, frankly, is a much more pleasant place to be, even if it is less useful.

I need some destuckification. And I have a technique for it: Consciousness integration, initially developed after reading that blog I linked to. I’m going rest for a bit, then try it, blogging as I go.

Quick refresher on consciousness integration: It works by having the semi-conscious part of your mind (the part generating the unhealthy thoughts or urges) talk with your conscious mind. To do this, you activate a new path between the two parts of your mind, then hold a particular mental posture to get them both talking. If everything goes right, the semi-conscious part updates to the adult world, and the unhealthy thoughts disappear.

(15 minutes later.)

I find the semi-conscious part of thinking mind creating that thought, “I just want to still be good for a while.” It’s already got an active connection to my conscious mind, which is good: Activating those paths is the slowest part of the integration.

The next step is to have the semi-conscious area talk with my conscious mind. Normally, I’d support my conscious mind through this, so all the adjustments happen in the semi-conscious area. But this time, I’m not sure I want to change this thought pattern. Maybe it’s right — maybe I do need more rest. So I’m going to let both areas talk while I pay attention to the conversation, and decide what to do after.

Then, 20 seconds later, it’s done. Here’s how the conversation went:

  • Semi-conscious area: It’s been so long since I felt good with manifesting. (Thinking of the several months debugging it.)
  • Conscious mind’s instinctive response: But don’t you want to get better?
  • (My conscious verbal response: That’s a lame way to convince anyone. Trite, even. I think my conscious mind is losing this debate.)
  • Semi-conscious area: Yes, I do.

And just like that, the resistance faded. I’m quite surprised it was that easy, and that delivering something so trite worked. (It worked because the message got to the right part of my mind — earlier, I’d thought it consciously, with zero results.)

But I don’t have time to dwell on this success — I have level 3 communication to learn.

If you liked this post, consider visiting my current blog at mikesententia.com.

Overcoming Resistance, Re-Starting Training

Wednesday, October 10th, 2012

You found my old blog. Thanks for visiting! For my new writing, visit mikesententia.com.

It’s Wednesday, 8:56 am.

Last night, I was looking forward to today’s training. This morning, I woke before 8 without an alarm, ate breakfast, and made sure I was ready to go by 9. And I am.

Except that I’m here, writing this post, instead of training.

I tried to start the training, got my notes in order and everything. Then I stopped. I’d encountered resistance.

I almost started playing video games. But instead, I’m writing this, which is at least a little productive (blog posts count, right?), and with any luck, will help me overcome this resistance.

Looking back in my notes, it’s been about a month since I did serious, focused training, and several months since I had a solid week of training. So, I’m trying to re-start an important but difficult habit that’s seriously fallen off, and I shouldn’t be surprised by resistance.

Let’s plan the session. Often, imagining the entire action will make it easier to do, because when you see that no single step is particularly hard, the project becomes non-threatening. Well, I would call my mentor, ask him to put me in touch with the communication trainers, and ask them to teach me level 2 communication. And that’s where my imagination stops: I have exactly zero idea what’s involved in that. And I feel the resistance rising again.

OK, another approach: I know I can do those first few steps, to contact the communication trainers. So, I’ll ask them what’s involved in learning this, and I’ll give myself permission to pause the training if it’s too much, so I can plan sessions and break the training into manageable bites.

I like this plan. Particularly because I know, from past experience, that I’m unlikely to actually call off the training. But having that option smooths out the resistance, which is what matters most right now. So, now, it’s 9:06 on Wednesday morning, and I’m going to get to work.

Also: Writing a blog post is now on my list of resistance-elimination techniques.

Update, 10:47 am: Having done 2 of my 3 planned training sessions today, I’m enjoying training again. Also, level 2 communication is pretty easy. I’m making a chart of what’s involved in each communication level, and will post that when it’s done.

If you liked this post, consider visiting my current blog at mikesententia.com.

Would You Rather Think You’re Good – Or Become Good?

Thursday, August 18th, 2011

You found my old blog. Thanks for visiting! For my new writing, visit mikesententia.com.

This week, I’m debugging my magickal communication so I can learn detailed, reliable manifesting. The first step is testing. Once I know exactly where it stops working, I can focus my training.

Testing is hard. Not hard as in “requires great magickal skill” or “requires many hours of work.” It’s hard as in scary, as in facing the Resistance.

The Resistance

This is Resistance with a capital R, as used by Seth Godin and Steven Pressfield. It’s when your unconscious distracts you and sabotages you from what you know you need to do. It’s procrastination, the kind where you won’t think about your work, rather than the kind where a plan feels half-baked and you want to mull it over.

Why does it happen? Well, once you have an accurate picture of what you can’t do yet, you can’t pretend you’re already good. Your unconscious will try to protect you. But if you let it, you’ll never actually become good. Every time I started testing, I’d feel my chest tighten, and go play a video game instead. That’s the Resistance.

Working Despite Resistance

People talk about “overcoming Resistance,” as though you first deal with your Resistance, then get to work. But that’s backward. The work comes first, then when you’ve done enough that the Resistance doesn’t matter, it goes away.

Here’s what worked for me:

I focused on each step of the communication. Engaging the right mental muscles. Making the message. Reading the reply. Doing all the sub-steps that make them work. My unconscious still didn’t like it. I still felt the tightness in my chest, but it didn’t matter. I can consciously direct each step, so I can do magick even if I don’t really want to.

Think of a carpenter. It doesn’t matter how he feels as he hammers a nail, just that he hammers it.

Working despite resistance feels like you’re just going through the motions. There’s no emotion or passion behind it. That’s fine. As long as you swing the hammer, you’ll get the work done and move past the Resistance.

Got Tips?

Share your tips for working despite resistance in the comments.

If you liked this post, consider visiting my current blog at mikesententia.com.